The Single Life

I have never officially lived the life of a single girl, because when I was actually old enough to enjoy it, I was in a relationship. So when I talk to my single friends, I don't always understand what they are going through, and why they are in such a rush to be in a relationship. I feel like if I was single, then I would take care of myself and my business better, in all actuality. I would have more time for myself, as opposed to constantly worrying about someone else. I don't want to be single, especially not now, because I love my boyfriend so much, but sometimes I feel like a single girl trapped inside of a relationship. And not even single in the sense of dating and sleeping with different men. In my opinion, that is not what the essence of single life is.

Single women, from what I have noticed, are usually on the prowl for a man. To me, being single, is about getting your self together. Handling your business and being extra confident, because all you have to worry about is you. I've also noticed that when women obsess about being with someone, or finding someone. The rare times when I was single, I don't remember worrying about being in a relationship. I guess because its one of the things that I don't have to worry about, then I do try to focus on myself somewhat. I just wish that more single women would take advantage of the single life.

They should focus on themselves. I've seen both sides of the single life from two different friends. My one friend, who was newly single out of a 5 year relationship, never ever looked for a man. She enjoyed her single life. She exercised, worked 24/7 and became a real catch. If I was a guy, I would look at her and think, okay, this woman has her shit together. She is making money, she looks good, she doesn't even need a man. And guess what, after being single for 2 1/2 years, single and happy, might I add, a guy started asking her out. She didn't jump right in to his arms either, she made him work for 6 months, because she didn't want to be tied down. But now, they have been dated for 2 years, however, I think she was happier single.

Basically, I think single woman shouldn't concern themselves with finding a man, it lets off a sense of desperation, which men can smell miles and miles away. But because my friend didn't care about finding a guy, and never really talked about, she ended up having someone chasing her. Even when I met my boyfriend, I didn't pay attention to him much. However, he paid attention to me.

Its probably harder for me to understand the single life, since I am not in that situation, but I do see what works for some people, and what doesn't work for others. I love my independence, but I also love coming home to someone, and going to bed next to someone. The further I get away from that single life, and I'm deep in a 7 year relationship, the more independent I am coming, if that makes sense.

My boyfriend and I, both have activities outside of our relationship and outside of work, to keep us totally busy and separate from each other. But its good to have something else to do besides sitting in each other's faces all night long. Ah, the single life is a mystery. A mystery that I don't think any woman can ever fully understand. But as long as you stay in love and taking care of yourself, then you have nothing to worry about, as far as finding a man. And don't actively look for one, he will spot you out of a crowd if you have your shit together. Not the other way around. I don't think any woman should ever chase after a man. We are the acceptors, not the chasers. If he asks us out, we either accept or decline. That is it...