June 2, 2008

Words

For as long as I can remember I’ve been writing. I love to write. Words haunt my mind at all hours of the night. Words keep me from going to sleep. Words wake me up early in the morning. Sometimes I get the urge in the middle of the night to just start writing. The other night I started writing this story, we’ll see how it develops.


I want to know, how much is the word worth? Right now my word is worth $0. That doesn’t mean my word means nothing to me, I just don’t get paid to write. I don’t know if I ever will though. That is not to say I’m not trying. I get calls, emails, etc… for writing jobs. But, you see, I don’t have any experience writing. Obviously I do, since I’m writing this shit right now, but I have never been paid for writing, which somehow leads to experience.


How can one find a job in this overcrowded market of Los Angeles? On a daily basis I hear thousand upon thousands of cars past my house, at all hours of the day. All of those people can’t be employed. They are my secret competition. Other writers, who may not love it as much as I do, but they probably have experience. So right now, I’m shit out of luck. I’m trying not to think too negatively, but there are days when I’m extra hard on myself.


So far I’ve been looking for a job in writing for a year. Since I finished college. And so far, I have had no luck. A lot of interest, but that is all. So until then, my words mean nothing.


People tell me that I inspire them, that I am such a great writer, and for some reason employers are interested. I guess people are just too lazy to train new people. I feel like the longer I go not working in writing, the more I’m going to loose interest. I’m trying to keep this blog updated as much as I possibly can. I’m a little distant right now, because of my current circumstances. But I will try to continue to write, and move forward. Remember, just because I’m not posting a blog, doesn’t mean I’m not writing. I have over 75 stories on my computer. Hopefully one day someone will be able to read it. Someone other than me, and the five people who read my blog. These words will continue to haunt me, until I somehow get every single word out of my head. Who knows how long that will take?

1 comment:

All-Mi-T [Thought Crime] Rawdawgbuffalo said...

u should just write and publish your own book that what i did